For all nursing mammas

UPDATE: This blog post was featured on ChickTalkDallas on Monday, Dec. 13, 2010. Thanks, Joanna! Visit chicktalkdallas.com for real women, real discussion. 

WARNING: Stop reading if you don't want to know about nursing and/or nursing bras or if words like chrissake offend you. I talk about boobs, too.

I've debated back and forth about whether I should write about my measly bra selection because with everything going on in my friends lives and the greater world around us, it's a bit of a so what? But, as the saying goes, I've reached a breaking point. Surely, there are others like me. There have to be other moms in my situation, so here goes: I want a sexy, lacy, underwire nursing bra in a color OTHER than white or nude.

I am sick and tired of rotating between a white cotton bra and a nude cotton bra. They're comfortable, but surely someone out there has another color- any color. At this point, I'd settle for lime green or Pepto-Bismol pink. Anything different. I mean, seriously folks! Victoria's Secret can make my normal 34B's feel which are now 38C's feel like 34DDD's but they can't make a sexy nursing bra in something other than white or nude.

I have to give VS credit for making and selling them at all - many stores/companies - don't, but the selection needs at least one addition. I have a VS Gold Card, for chrissake, yet it has rarely been used in three years because I nursed my first child for 18 months and my second one is on month 11 as we speak. There was about a year in there where I stocked up on a few necessities, but bra shopping when you're pregnant and likely to change sizes multiple times over the next year isn't very practical or economical. And a girl can only spend so much on panties....so I've avoided VS like the plague and kept my pretty Gold Card tucked away in my dresser drawer, longing for the day when it'll resurface as my most-used store credit card.

I know some of you may say that there are other brands besides VS. This is very true. Playtex makes a nice nursing bra that I'm wearing right now. I have two of them - one in white, one in nude. I'd love a black one, but they don't seem to exist in my size. Other colors don't seem to exist either. I seem to recall that I had a Maidenform nursing bra that actually had lace on it when I was nursing my first child. That one died a long, long death - 18 months of 6-8 feedings a day will do that to a girl.

Which gets me back to my original point - what's up with plain jane nursing bras? Bra companies can make prepubescent girls feel like they have Madonna's cones strapped to their chest, but the very women who spawned those new customers can't even rate one new option in the color department?

Do you think I'm asking too much? I don't think so. All I'm really asking for is another color -- one more color. I'll even pay more. I won't sign over my first-born but I and I imagine many other long-term nursing moms would fork over a bit more cash for a few more colorful options.

It's true that all this would be moot if I stopped nursing. I could wear my normal bras and the rest of my wardrobe, for that matter, but that's not an option currently on the table. I'll stop nursing when I'm ready and that's not now, so don't go there.

And don't tell me that it can't be done, either. I know it can. After all, if VS can make women who don't need bras feel like supermodels, then surely they can dye a couple thousand nursing bras pink... or purple...or blue...or grey...or red... you get my point.

Feeding elephants

The Squid has always loved her dolls. From the moment she first laid eyes on her miniature Winnie-the-Pooh bear, she's been there to make sure that all her baby dolls and stuffed animals were well taken care of. She has cleaned up "stinky" diapers, "fed" them milk, juice and snacks when they were hungry, and put them to bed when they were tired and cranky.

Needless to say, it wasn't surprising when she grabbed her baby elephant and a bottle before joining the Monkey and I out on the porch Wednesday night. We were sitting out on the stoop, enjoying the cool weather and trying to catch a glimpse of the moon through the trees and clouds. The Squid plopped down right beside us and started giving her baby elephant a bottle of milk. I showed her how to tilt it upwards so her baby would get the "milk", then went back to playing with the Monkey - who was trying to pull the leaves off the nearby bush so she could eat them. I glanced back over at the Squid just in time to see her lift up the left side of her shirt and nestle the baby elephant up to her chest. - all without revealing her bare skin.

"She needs milk, mommy," she told me, reclining backwards just a bit to suggest that there was nothing remotely unusual about breastfeeding a baby elephant on the front porch. There's not, right??

"Oh," was about all I managed to say as I pursed my lips shut to keep from laughing. It was really, really cute.

After a few minutes, the Squid very discreetly pulled her shirt back down, cuddled her "baby" in her arms and went to put her down for a nap on the nearby table. "She's sleepy from the milk," she said, nudging her baby in the right sleeping position.

"Oh, is that right," I said. "That's because you're such a good mommy."

And she is.

One tired mamma

I've come up with a new word to describe feeling tired: parent. It's probably not very original. Just about every parent I know feels the same way. We're like walking zombies when our kids aren't around and only somewhat cognizant when they are around so we can somehow prevent them from running in front of a car, touching a hot stove, choking on a stale brownie. Those that aren't tired are just afraid to admit that their kids wear them out. I know mine do. It's in a good way, but mothering a 3-year-old and a 10-month-old is challenging in so many ways.

Take this as an example of a typical conversation with the Squid.
Squid; I'm hungry. I want a snack, mommy. (while opening the fridge)(Oh, and she's whining)
Me: Close the fridge, you're letting all the cold air out. What would you like? (Mistake #1. Never ask what they want - always offer 2-3 choices.)
Squid: Opening the fridge for a second time. I want an egg.
Me: Close the fridge. You can't have an egg. They haven't been cooked and mommy doesn't have time to cook one. How about a banana?
Squid: I don't want a nanna. I want an egg. Opens the fridge AGAIN and pulls an egg out of the container.
Me: Give me the egg and close the fridge. You can't have an egg. You can have a banana.
Squid; I don't want a nanna. (in whiny voice)
Me: If you want a snack, you're going to have a banana or a piece of cheese.
Squid: I want strawberries.
Me: We don't have any strawberries. (AHHHH. Ready to pull hair out). You can have a banana, a piece of cheese or nothing. Take your pick.
Squid: Can I have a nanna?
Me: Fine. That's all your getting until Dad gets home, though.

Keep in mind that this entire conversation took place while the Monkey sat on the kitchen floor, rather impatiently waiting for her own portion of whatever her big sister scored. And that's only one of at least half a dozen similar conversations that took place that day alone. With that in mind, hats off to parents - particularly those of multiples! I don't see how you handle more than one talking toddler at the same time. :-)